But when darkness falls, a crushing loneliness is all that I have.
Or so I misguided myself to believe,
It will all turn out fine,
Everything will be okay,
I know happiness is right around the corner,
It’s the inevitable path I’m destined to walk down on,
It was just an illusion,
A sinister lie I kept telling myself, one that has roots deep within my soul,
At the end, the pieces to the puzzle will eventually piece themselves together,
This is the undeniable reality.
I’m just not good enough, I never will be,
Hidden layers of insecurities you’ll never be able to decode.
A mellow rhapsody, the true meaning of which many are oblivious to,
Upside down, that’s the key to decipher this twisted world,
Contrary to what actually is,
It looks different from your perspective,
I leave it to your interpretation,
In an abode that is so dark and cold, the lowest point of my life.
I’m spiraling, falling headfirst,
Descending in an inexplicable feeling, a joy I haven’t felt in years,
It’s pulled me back to where I started.
The familiar darkness and overwhelming depression,
That’s nothing but a fading memory now.
Surrounded by love and positivity,
These times are here to stay.
Harrowing emptiness and a despondent despair,
They remain banished and replaced.
Inspiration and renewed will,
I try convincing myself.
Not everything is as gloomy as I make it out to be,
But the pursuit seems to be eternal,
That’s what they all say,
Happiness is a state of mind, but the final destination I will reach sooner or later.
Happy new year y’all. Hope ’19 is kinder to you than 2018 was. Go wild!